Dude #23 - a new kind of bird at the opera

“Well, I think we will have a rather late spring.  You see there is a new kind of bird which has come into our section of country, a very rare bird.  I don’t know what the bird is good for, nor do I know where it came from.  I don’t think they are fit for anything, though I see quite a number of them here in Washington.  The majority of them here and all in our section are young birds, though I see some old ones here.  I saw an old one at the theatre last night.”

“Which theatre?”

“Ford’s.  He occupied a front seat, and seemed to take a great deal of interest in the crowd.  He had a very large pair of opera-glasses, and was continually bouncing up and down looking at the vast assemblage of people in the theatre.”

Now, the Critic would like for you to explain what use a bird has for opera-glasses.”

Lord bless your soul, this bird that I have been talking about is a dude, and I tell you they are getting to be a little too numerous in this section for the good of society.  They are a little too fresh.  We must do something to get them out of the country or they will ruin it.”

Evening Critic (Washington DC), April 17 1883, page 2.