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Friday, January 8, 2016

Dude #14 - Confession of a Dude.

I wonder what there is in me
  That makes folks smile as I go by.
My air is good, my clothes fit well;
  They cannot think I am a guy.
And yet they smile.  How very rude!
I may have faults; but I'm a Dude.

They are not Dudes themselves.  Ah, there
  The trouble is.  We Dudes are born;
We stir the envy of the throng,
  To which, thank Heav'n, we don't belong.
Not of the vulgar multitude
Are we.  Who would not be a Dude?

It is my comfort and my pride
  To know that what I am I am.
And what we are - what are we
  Anyhow?  By Jove, I'd have to cram
To learn; and learning's not my mood.
Who learns can never be a Dude.

I know I have no brains -
  They must be very hard to get -
And brains would never, never take
  In our select, exclusive set.
We care for better things, imbued
With all that glorifies the Dude.

The german I can lead; I bang
  My hair; I wear my trousers tight;
I dote on Chambertin; I hate
  To read or think;' I pass the night
At clubs; in short, I love the nude,
Though Art is not the dudest Dude.

To be a Dude is my whole aim.
  A Dude is chic, is nobby swell,
To feel that Life's a dreadful bore,
Creation's self an awful sell.
The swellest thing, from our point of view'd,
Is to recede from Man to Dude.

          - Junius Henri Browne.
New York, April 5, 1883.



The Evening Star (Washington DC), April 11, 1883, page 7. 


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